Dolce Acido Amaro

Parents

Do you ever wonder how miserable ur life is under ur parents? Do u ever wonder why some parents cant be "cool" parents like the others? Do u wonder why some of them are being so overprotective?

Question : Why is my parents being so overprotective towards me? Why do they always think that everything they say is right? Why they are not open minded enough? Why they always have to choose for me?

Just only as I was staring blankly at my computer screen, my mind started to wonder away.... wondering why am I like this as if I a little bird still in her tiny little cage. Rarely got the chance to fly out, rarely got the chance to get her freedom, rarely got the chance to choose what she wants. I understand that my parents are protective over me. They took care of me well to make sure I'm safe and sound. They control me so that I won't indulge in negative activities. They set rules on me so that I don't go beyond my limits.

However sometimes I felt they are selfish. Selfish for not giving me a chance to explore the society myself, not giving me a hope in being more independent, not giving me enough of space for me to breath, not giving me the freedom normal teenagers have. I am 19 going on 20 this coming June but I still can't do most teenagers do. Hang out with friends at night for a drink or two, sleep over friends place, stay back late for activities, having fun or party once awhile, get back home after 12am, go travel with friend every sem break, go up KL for shopping with my buddies.. pretty sad ya for a 20year old girl?

I know I'm a girl and every parents expect their girl to be an obedient, smart and perfect daughter. No doubt that I'm the youngest in my family too which leads my parents to be overprotective towards me. I know by all means they care for me, but sometimes I think they should at least respect the life of their daughter. I'm trying not to go against their wills. For now, I felt I'm just a piece on the chess board. Parents are the one who decide where I should go, where I should move. As u all know, they even choose my future path for me, they objected my choice in desigining. Mum was more considerate than dad, she persuaded me to go for business, at least it'll help if I wanted to take desigining in future. For dad, he always want me to get a more professional job especially pharmacies. Until today, he still mentions about it. I'm suffocating now as if I'm in a small little box grasping for air.

Hence, this is the real Adelene that is mold because of her overprotective parents. She no longer stand her parents, she stills listen to her parents because she do not want her parents to assume she's spoilt or disobedient and with that Adelene.....
- Found the one that is very dear to her besides her family.
- Started telling lots of lies to her family.

Yes. I dare said I lied alot to my parents. If I said to gain more freedom, some will said it's ridiculous, some may said I'm a big fat liar who lied to my parents, some may look down on me, some feel sad for me, some wanting me to stop lying. How? I'm stuck between two side. If I don't do this I don't think I'll get this much freedom I have. Of course it's not alot compared to my other friends. On the other hand, I felt sad, disgraceful, disobedient towards my parents. How I really wish they can understand me, guide me, listen to me. It wouldn't be that bad if they give me some freedom like other kids do and I'll make sure I'll draw my lines. Now they are just making me crossing over the line. Sigh. Maybe I should just wait til I graduate to be a free bird.

As for now, I have to learn to stop lying to my parents, I have to balance up my activities and studies, I need to study real hard to attain my goals, I need to prove to my parents that they are wrong. Nothing wrong if I got a bf in University. Nothing wrong if I get to hang out with friends. Nothing wrong if I'm a little busy with my activities. Nothing wrong for me to get a MP3 player while I'm still studying. There's nothing wrong about it!! Nothing can distract you unless you can't control myself but I CAN! I have Alex here to guide me, he's a excellent guy who excel in everything. I really want to tell my parents about him but better not taking that risk. I don't want him to suffer because of me. This is what I always dream of, I hope I graduate from MMU with 1st class honours and on that very day itself I want to tell my parents " Pa, mmy..... this is my bf of 4years,Alex, He's the one guiding me all these while... and there's nothing wrong having a bf during studies period and now I did prove to you that you are wrong. " To fulfill that dream, all I need to do now is to work my ass off. I know I have lots to catch up.. need to quicken up my pace to bring up my CGPA and I know I can do it. Come on Adelene.. u are a smart little girl. I know u can do it.. just be more hardworking that's all u need. No more last minute study. :)

p/s: Just pray for me ok friends?? :)